Chicago's the greatest

Chicago's the greatest

Monday, March 5, 2012

Peter Von Stephen McPrune









Peter Von Stephen McPrune
By Jon Slone










To sup with Peter Von Stephen McPrune.
Is something you won’t forget any time soon!
For dinning, according to one Mr. Stephen,
Is a maze where the meal has to balance out even.


And there has to be something on his plate that’s white.
And there has to be drink for his very last bite.
And his Waldorf salad can never be dry.
And his tuna can never be cooped up on rye.
And he has to have garden-fresh, hot-house tomatoes.
And his carrots can never touch his peas or potatoes.
And his top-ranking starch has to sit there and fast.
Cause Prune doesn’t spoon up that starch until last!

To sup with Peter Von Stephen McPrune.
Is something you won’t forget any time soon!
For dinning, according to one Mr. Stephen,
Is a maze where the meal has to balance out even.
He nibbles some noodle. He pulls at some pork.
He props-up some peas on his platinum fork.
He pinches off pieces of Pennyworth Ham.
Then he lathers his biscuit in Bawberry Jam.
He gobbles some Chokecherry Tart with a grin.
Then a peck of potato-cake finds its way in.

But what if his food found a mind of its own?
And a small piece of pork, were there not on the bone.
And the ice cream’s ah plenty with a shortage of cone.
And the butter’s in bloom but there’s scarcely a scone.

And there’s two little peas next to ten little beans.
And there’s hardly no ham and he’s scarfed-up his greens.

And there’s leftover lobster but he’s lacking in leek.
And the taters are waning from his Bubble and Squeak.

And there’s no more Jam, save a wee bit of Jelly.
And his soup has all sunk to the foot of his belly.


What then, what then, oh my, what then?
What a pickle poor Pete would find himself in!


To sup with Peter Von Stephen McPrune.
Is something you won’t forget any time soon!
For dinning, according to one Mr. Stephen,
Is a maze where the meal has to balance out even.










Jon HBM Slone

1 comment:

  1. I love this and you know why I love this...having things come out even was a weakness of my grandfather and I have seen him eat more, trying to make everything come out even. But this was just so well written and so clever that papaw would love it....kinda a tribute to his personality and I love you work and the way your mind just conjures up all these new ideas...This is just charming...thanks

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